There’s nothing like a really clever joke or one-liner to make us laugh, and that’s why we the team at Quotereel really enjoyed collecting these clever quotes. Most of them are funny, some of them are thoughtful, and some are thought-provoking.
1. It’s okay if you disagree with me. I can’t force you to be right.
Clever humor is often based on sarcasm, which is a way of saying something different from what is actually meant. But nowadays sarcasm can be very crude, so we decided to choose only clever sarcastic quotes, or quotes based on irony, which is the gentler cousin of sarcasm. We hope you enjoy these quotes as much as we do, and if you do, be sure to check out our funny friendship quotes.
2. Patience: what you have when there are too many witnesses
The thing about sarcasm is that it has to be really clever in order to be classy. If it’s well done, someone can insult you without you even realizing it. Many funny TV shows rely on clever one-liners and sarcasm to make us laugh. Great examples are “The Big Bang Theory”, “Two and a Half Men”, and “Friends”. Often the jokes on those shows are so clever that you need to think about them for a moment before you get them. When sarcasm is witty and cleverly done, as in those cases, it is a very high form of humor that is extremely gratifying for most of us. Somehow it’s really enjoyable to make fun of each other in very clever ways.
3. If you can’t convince them, confuse them
4. It’s a great act of cleverness to be able to conceal being clever
Often the best clever quotes are actually making fun of the person saying them, which shows that some very clever people enjoy making fun of themselves, instead of others. Humor is a great way to soften the blow of becoming aware of one’s faults and shortcomings, and so helps us to forgive ourselves for not being perfect. We all screw up sometimes, and it’s great to see the funny side of the situation and then move on.
5. My clever comebacks usually surface an hour too late
6. It’s funny how after an argument is over, you think about more clever things you should have said.
7. If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always gotten.
Many studies done by psychologists show that irony, sarcasm, and other forms of clever humor are associated with a high level of creativity and intelligence. So, it’s not only fun to enjoy clever jokes, but it also develops our IQ and creative skills. What could be better than getting smarter while having fun? Go right ahead and make fun or your friends and yourself, just remember to do it in a clever way.
8. I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I’m saying
9. “All men are the same” should be “All men I like are the same.” Girls, let’s be honest.
10. Speak when you are angry and you’ll make the best speech you’ll ever regret.
Well, what is a good way to cultivate cleverness and wit? One great approach is to read literature, such as the works of William Shakespeare and Oscar Wilde. Their books and plays are filled to the brim with witty jokes and clever lines. However, some of the language is a little out of date, so if you want to go with more modern expressions of intelligent humor, watch Dr. House or Seinfeld on their TV shows. Both characters are masters of clever sarcasm, and their expressions of wit are unmatched.
11. If you always do what interests you, at least one person is pleased (Katherine Hepburn).
12. I never make stupid mistakes. Only very, very clever ones (John Peel).
13. Hey, I found your nose. It was in my business.
This collection of short clever quotes is intended to help anyone who reads them to stop taking life too seriously. There are so many things in this world out or our control, and it’s impossible to make everything work out exactly as we want it to. So, it’s better to lighten up and joke about the things we cannot change. It’s also extremely satisfying to make fun of those who take themselves too seriously, especially pompous celebrities and politicians.
14. A compromise is an agreement whereby both parties get what neither of them wanted.
15. Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself (Rumi).
16. Tact is for people who aren’t clever enough to be sarcastic.
Witty jokes and clever phrases have to be delivered with a lot of confidence in order to be successful. You should know that you’re being funny without needing validation from your audience. In fact, sometimes people won’t get your joke (especially if it’s too clever), or at least not right away. The important thing is that you know you’re being funny.
17. To be old and wise you must first be young and stupid.
18. I’m sorry for what I said when I was hungry.
19. Raisin cookies that look like chocolate chip cookies are the main reason why I have trust issues.
Sarcastic lines are great as comebacks when someone insults you, or offends you in some way. Instead of sinking to the offending person’s level of primitive verbal abuse or aggressive behavior, instead you get back at them in very clever way. It’s really funny to watch them as they realize you just insulted them, but they can’t quite figure out how. While conflict is rarely a good thing, clever sarcastic comebacks are probably the most civilized way to deal with it.
20. The thing about smart people is that they seem like crazy people to dumb people.
21. Whoever snuck the ‘s’ into fast food was a clever little bastard.
If you enjoyed these clever quotes, you might also like our friendship quotes.