Sex Jokes

Let’s face it, not everyone has the stomach to stand a hilarious sex joke. Not even all can get one. But when you find yourself preparing to emit one, make sure that you are in the right crowd. Unless you want unwanted reactions from people who might find your jokes a bit inappropriate for the occasion. Remember fellas, anyone can be offended about something and you should be careful enough to not cause one! Be bold but stay safe. After all, sex jokes, like the rest, are all for the laughs.

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Having sex in an elevator is wrong on so many levels

Anal intercourse is for assholes.

Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.

If a woman sleeps with 10 men she’s a slut, but if a man does it… He’s gay, definitely gay.

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My girlfriend’s dad asked me what I do. Apparently, “your daughter” wasn’t the right answer.

Why do women love Chinese food? Because WON TON spelled backward is NOT NOW!

I asked my wife why she never blinked during foreplay. She said she didn’t have time.

Why did frosty pull down his pants? He heard the snow blower coming.

My penis was in the Guinness book of world records. – Then the librarian told me to take it out.

If sex is a pain in the ass, then you’re doing it wrong…

I think sex is better than logic, but I can’t prove it.

I was excited my teacher asked me for sex in exchange for a good grade, but then I realized I was home-schooled.

Did you know that when pigeons have sex, they die? Really? Well, the one I F–ked did.

Children in the back seats of cars cause accidents, but accidents in the back seats of cars cause children.

If a woman sleeps with 10 men she’s a slut, but if a man does it… He’s gay, definitely gay.

I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, “Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!” I said, “Wow!” Then her friend said, “She means 666-3629.”

Children in the dark make accidents, but accidents in the dark make children.

Does time fly when you’re having sex or was it really just one minute?

I wonder what my parents did to fight boredom before the internet. I asked my 17 brothers and sisters and they didn’t know either.

Today I was asked to go out, by 20 girls. – I was in the women’s bathroom.

Why is sex like math? You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there’s no multiplying.

This compilation of old dirty but humourous sex jokes will entertain your open-minded grit. Who says humor has its borders? Well, it may have one, for the easily offended chaps. But in your case, you might be finding some bold type of jest, which most people can deliberately relate to or understand. If you can’t get these, then you’re safe. But if you do, then you really have that old dirty sense of humor.